Never Again

never see again
photo courtesy of Jennifer Gusey

Never again.

Have you said those words? Thought them? Hoped them?

Never again. I won’t let that happen again.

Won’t allow that person into my life.

Can’t let myself dwell on it.

Never again.

And have you turned from that person/place/thing that you promised would never again be? Have you let yourself forget it/him/her?

Stuffed down the memories/emotions/pain.

Then, one day, the barrier you think you’ve built up…well…it fails. And it all rushes at you.

Has that ever happened to you?

And, in that moment, you almost give in. Let that memory or pain or person destroy your joy. Stomp it. Twisting its foot to grind your joy into the cement like a cigarette butt. To extinguish it.

But then you remember. That one thing. The most important thing.

My grace is sufficient for you. 

In your weakness, my power is made complete.

Toss this pain to Me. I’ll carry it for you.

You remember that God sees you.

That one thing. That most important thing is God.

You remember that He loves you.

That He isn’t insulted by your doubt.

Or faithlessness.

Or your inability to call out to Him.

You remember that, even in the pain. The fear. The weakness.

He IS.

And you know that it might not make sense. Why did that person/place/thing come back? Why now? Why didn’t God stop it the first time? Why do you feel He is so far off now?

You know that the answers aren’t easy.

But that never again will you be alone.

Never again will you be without hope.

Never again will you be unloved.

And that when our never again’s meet HIS never again’s. We are healed.

6 Comments on “Never Again

  1. This reminds me of a scene in Forrest Gump. As I recall, Jenny is throwing stones at the house where she grew up and Forrest can’t fully understand why — but she never wants to see that house again, either!

    Like

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