Prank — Inspired by Nickole Huffman

We’ve had the craziest month, right? So crazy that I actually misplaced this story idea! How is this even possible? Because I’m Susie. So, in short, I’m a little off schedule. But you’ll forgive me, right? Thank you.

This idea comes from Nickole Huffman. Nicki is a Freedom Fighter with Better Way Imports, a wife, mom, runner and all around beautiful person. She has inspired me with her humor, wisdom and compassionate nature. She is one of those people who is ALWAYS doing something for someone else. She understands mercy. Nicki is a very special person to me.

Here is her idea (I’m so glad I found it. It’s a silly one.)…

“Sally Vanhandel is fun, energetic and from Asia. Enjoys playing pranks on people. Present time in Las Vegas. Conflict: tries to play a trick on a stranger who happens to be a world famous millionaire and gets caught.”

“I’m getting that guy,” Sally said, reapplying bright red lipstick. “He looks like he’d be good.”

“Oh, I don’t know.” Rita giggled, hiding behind a plastic ficus tree in a casino. “I bet he’s real smart.”

“Come on, Rita. I’ll totally get him.”

“What’s your angle? This is a serious thing.”

“Pranks aren’t serious.”

“Well, you know what I mean. So, what are you going to do?”

“No idea. I’ll get him to buy me dinner, though.”

Sally swayed her hips as she walked toward the man. They weren’t narrow hips. Nothing less than plump. Those hips were wide from the birth of several children. And they were soft from the love of all things chocolate. But she certainly knew how to use the movement of those hips.

She stood near the man. But not too close. And she pretended that she was far too fabulous to be bothered with his loud talking into a cell phone.

“Nah, I don’t want to go to the casino. What, like I need to win more money?” He looked at Sally. “Yeah, don’t want to go to the bar either.”

Sally turned toward him, but didn’t look at his face. Her eyes looked at the carpet right in front of his very shiny, very expensive looking shoe. It was a trick she’d learned in a course on flirtation and dating the year after her husband died.

“Listen, I have to go,” the man said into the phone. “Hi, there.”

“Oh, me?” she asked, forgetting to be smooth. “Hi. I like your shoes.”

She made a mental note to kick herself when the prank was over. This would the her initiation into the Vegas Pranksters. It was a group of women over the age of 50 that lived to play tricks on people. Just this one prank and she would be an official member.

Sally just hadn’t figured out what gag she was pulling.

“Thank you. I had these shoes made specifically for me. I have my own cobbler.”

“You have a cobbler? I’ve never met anyone who had their own cobbler before.”

He moved closer to her. “You’ve never met me before.”

“You’re right.” She became flustered. Her husband had been gone for three years and since then, no man had looked at her like that. “I’m Sally.”

“Hello, Sally. I’m Robbie.”

“People call you Robbie? But you must be 60 years old.”

“Try 70. And people call me whatever I tell them to.”

“I see. That’s interesting.”

Sally stole a look a look at Rita. That lady was still behind the ficus, messing around with her telephone.

“Sally, such a beautiful name.”

“It is? I always thought it was kind of cutsie.”

“Sally. Oh, it just rolls off the tongue.”

She was unnerved by the man. Robbie. He had her blushing. She wondered how she would be able to pull a prank on him.

“I think I’ve seen you before somewhere. And that’s not a pick up line. I’m serious. You seem very familiar for some reason.” She said.

“Well, it sure is a disappointment to me that you weren’t delivering a pick up line.”

“Ha!” she said, much louder than she needed to. She’d hoped to get the attention of Rita. “You’re a funny man.”

“Come eat dinner with me.”

“Only if you’re buying.”

“Of course I am.”

Well, even if the prank wasn’t going to work out, at least she was getting a free dinner.

—

He took her into one of the most elite restaurants in Vegas.

“Two for nonsmoking, please,” Sally said to the lady at the door. “If you have anything by a window, that would be nice.”

“Actually, Sally, they know me here.” He put a hand on Sally’s shoulder and led her to a table in a private room.

 “Wow. This sure is a fancy place. I’ve lived in Las Vegas for six years and never knew this place was here.”

“How about you tell me a little about yourself.”

“Oh, not one for small talk, are you?”

“Where are you from? I want to know everything.”

“I was born in the Philippines.”

“You don’t look Asian.”

“Oh, I know. My parents were on vacation. Mother didn’t know she was expecting until, well, there I was.”

“Vacation? In the Philippines? I wasn’t aware that people went there for vacation in the 1970’s.”

“Two things. You are a gem of a man for saying that I was born in the 70’s. Second. You’re in more disbelief that my folks were on vacation than that I was a total and complete surprise?”

“No, I’m just disappointed that I missed a prime opportunity for a resort investment. That’s all. Tell me more.”

Sally told him about her childhood. Most of it consisted of lies and half truths. She was spinning some kind of badly constructed web. But he seemed to believe every word she said. Even the part about being cousins with the person who photographed the Loch Ness Monster.  She was becoming more and more worried the less and less she was able to control her words. She even stopped listening to herself. Finally, she said something that made his eyebrows join and his lips pout.

“What did I just say?”

“That in ten days you’re going to have your head removed and frozen in a cryogenic freezer.”

“Yup. That’s right.” Sally panicked, trying to figure out what would have made her say that. “So, I’m living it up here in Vegas for my last hurrah.”

“That is, until they defrost your head in the future.”

“Right. Me and Walt Disney.”

“You’ll need someone to take care of things for you. Your estate. Paying the lab to hold your head.”

“I would have to pay storage space for my head? That’s ridiculous.”

“I know, darling,” Robbie reached across the table and held her hand. “But I can afford it.”

“You would pay for my head storage?” Sally asked, almost forgetting that she was not, indeed, going to have her head frozen. “Why would you do that?”

“Because I love you. I’ve loved you from the very moment I saw you.”

“That was an hour ago.”

“But it’s been the best hour of my life.” Robbie moved his chair closer to Sally. “Dear Sally, I’ve been trying to buy happiness for most of my life. I’ve never found it like this. Please, please, don’t reject me.”

“This is really weird, Robbie.”

“Love is weird.”

“But, I don’t think you totally understand what’s going on. Are you missing some marbles?”

“Only for the love of you.” He lowered himself to one knee. “If you only knew how painful this is for me right now, you would never be able to say ‘no’.”

“Painful?”

“Arthritis.”

“Well, then get up.”

“Sally Lawrencetta Divinia VanHandle…”

“What kind of name is that?”

“That’s what you said your name was. That is your name, right?”

“Right. Right. Sorry.”

“Anyway, Sally, would you marry me?” Robbie pulled out a velvet box with a huge diamond ring inside.

“You just carry that thing around with you?”

“I knew that my Princess would come along someday!”

“Well, I’m not so sure. Maybe you should just let me explain…”

Sally tried to tell him about the prank. The nonexistent prank, that is. But Robbie would hear nothing of it. Before she knew it, they were in a wedding chapel. Elvis stood before them. Rita, somehow, had joined her.

“You look so beautiful, Sally.” Rita fluffed her friend’s hair. “I’m just so happy for you.”

“But, isn’t this supposed to be my prank on this man?”

“And you found the man of your dreams!”

“No! Rita! This isn’t supposed to be happening!”

“Shush, Sally. You’re just nervous. I mean, who doesn’t get a little weird when they’re days from having their heads frozen.”

“No. I don’t what do have my head frozen.”

“But that’s what Robbie’s already arranging for.”

“They don’t actually do that kind of thing, do they?”

“When you’re as rich as Robbie, they’ll do anything. Now cut it out. Elvis is about to start your wedding.”

“Dearly beloved…”

Sally swooned, but didn’t quite faint. Rita held her up. Just when it seemed that her marriage would be announced by The King, Robbie stopped him.

“Hold on, Elvis. I’d like to talk to my bride for a moment.”

“No problem.”

“Sally, I think that you should know something about me before we proceed.”

“Yes?”

“I belong to a secret society. Not many understand it. Most resent it. But I’m hoping that  you’ll understand.”

“I need to tell you something, too…”

“Now, hush, darling. Me first.” He held her hands. “I am a member of the Vegas Prank-Stars.”

“Prank-Stars?”

“Yes. The male wing of the Pranksters. This was my initiation.”

“No…it was mine.”

“Well, I got you first!” He let go of her hands. “You’ve been Prank-Starred.”

Rita laughed. Elvis laughed. Robbie laughed.

Sally sobbed and sobbed. Tears of relief.  Her head felt warmer than it had for hours.